Have a look at some of the useless (may be useful to some one.. ;-D) Inventions by Japanese
The Art of Appraisal *** Well Suits for Software Engineers ***
Big Boss: This year your performance was good, excellent and outstanding. So, your rating is "average".
Kumar: What? How come 'average'?
Big Boss: Because...err...uhh...you lack domain knowledge.
Kumar: But last year you said I am a domain expert and you put me in this project as a domain consultant.
Big Boss: Oh is it? Well, in that case, I think your domain knowledge has eroded this year.
Kumar: What???
Big Boss: Yes, I didn't see you sharing knowledge on Purchasing domain.
Kumar: Why would I? Because I am not in Purchasing, I am in Manufacturing.
Big Boss: This is what I don't like about you. You give excuse for everything.
Kumar: Huh? *Confused*
Big Boss: Next, you need to improve your communication skills.
Kumar: Like what? I am the one who trained the team on "Business Communication", you sat in the audience and took notes, you remember?
Big Boss: Oh is it? Errr...well..I mean, you need to improve your Social Pragmatic Affirmative Communication.
Kumar: Huh? What the hell is that? *Confused*
Big Boss: See! That's why you need to learn about it.
Kumar: *head spinning*
Big Boss: Next, you need to sharpen your recruiting skills. All the guys you recruited left within 2 months.
Kumar: Well, not my mistake. You told them you will sit beside them and review their code, and most resigned the next day itself. Couple of them even attempted suicide.
Big Boss:*stunned* (recovers from shock) Err...anyway, I tried to give you a better rating, but our Normalization
process gave you only 'average'.
Kumar: Last year that process gave me 'excellent'. This year just 'average'? Why is this process pushing me up and down every year?
Big Boss: That's a complicated process. You don't want to hear.
Kumar: I'll try to understand. Go ahead.
Big Boss: Well, we gather in a large room, write down the names of sub-ordinates in bits of paper, and throw them up in the air. Whichever lands on the floor gets 'average', whichever lands on table gets 'good', whichever we manage to catch gets 'excellent' and whichever gets stuck to ceiling gets 'outstanding'.
Kumar: (eyes popping out) What? Ridiculous! So who gets 'poor' rating?
Big Boss: Those are the ones we forget to write down.
Kumar: What the hell! And how can paper bits stick to ceiling for 'outstanding'?
Big Boss: Oh no, now you have started questioning our 20 year old organizational process!
Kumar: *faints*
See ur rating and know where a paper with ur name landed!!!!!!!!!!!
Ha ha ha…
Ultimate Definition (CIGARETTE) - Part 01
CIGARETTE:
A pinch of tobacco
rolled in paper
with fire at one end
and a fool at the other!
Know your iPhone4: Setting Up Clocks for Different Time Zones
Start at the Home screen and tap on the Utilities folder, then tap on Clock. Tap on World Clock at the bottom-left corner of the screen. By default, the World Clock screen shows the current times in Cupertino, California and New York. To delete a clock (we’ll delete Cupertino’s clock here), tap the Edit button in the upper-left corner, and a red circle with a – (minus sign) appears before each city. Tap the red circle for the one you want to delete and a Delete button appears on the right. Tap Delete and it’s gone (the clock— not Cupertino itself). To add a new city, tap the + (plus sign) button in the top-right corner to bring up a city search field and keyboard. Type in the city you want to add (in our example here, I typed in London. Actually, I just typed in “lon” and London, England, appeared in the list). When your city appears in the list, just tap on it and it’s added as a clock. To add more cities, just tap the + button again.
A list of paid survey scams
Are you looking to earn money online by participating in a surveys ? Are they asking for money to become a member ? then you should think of it.. before joining... Here are few list of websites which are confirmed as SCAM Survey websites.... beware don't join in any such kind of websites without checking their legitimacy..... and Don't waste your time.......
A list of paid survey scams (confirmed):
1. AWSurveys.com scam (A scam, does not pay, now still online)
2. COMEUS (A scam, does not pay – now closed)
A list of paid survey scams (suspects):
1. e-meng.com scam.cn (A Chinese paid surveys panel, seemed to be a scam)
2. www.aivote.com scam (A Chinese paid surveys panel, seemed to be a scam)
3. www.dfooter.com scam (A Chinese paid surveys panel, seemed to be a scam)
4. www.51money.com scam scam
5. www.wenkee.com scam scam
Many More.....
123opinions.com
A
Adbux.org
AMPSurveys.com
AskAmerica.org
Australia Survey Panel.com
AWSurveys
B
BeeHeard.com
BeginSurvey Inc.
Best Cash Jobs.com
bestfocusgroups.com
Biz Opp Junction.com .
Bolt.com
C
Campus-Surveys.org
Canada Survey Panel.com
Cash For Surveys.com
D
Data Entry Pro.com
Desktop Innovation
Dynamic Logic
E
Easy-Paid-Surveys.com
Easy Rewards.com.au
Easy Student Work.com
eBookslife
ECN research
Einsights
eMarketPanel.com
e-MarketsResearch.com
Encinitasca.org
eWorldresearch
Express Paid Ssurveys.com
Eye Cloud.com
F
FocusWorld
Franklin Surveys.com .
Freebie People.com
Free Pay.com
Free Paying Surveys.com
Fusion Cash.net
G
GBinc.
Genuine Survey Jobs.com
Get Cash For Surveys.com
Get Paid2.com
Get Cash For Surveys.com
Get Paid For Photos.com
Get Paid To Surveys.com
Get Paid To Try.com
Global Survey Group.com
Go Paid Surveys.com
Grant-Sources.com.
GreenHorse.com
H
Handbag Test Panel
Highest Pay Surveys.com
Home Job Solutions.com
Home Typers.com
HyperSurvey.
I
Interactive Opinions.com.au
Incentive Reward Center.com
i-netvalues.com/optIn.htm
Internet Opinion Group.com
Internet Survey Group.com
Its Your Opinion.com
Its Yours Now.net
J
K
Kelly research
L
Low Risk Incomes.com
M
Mailbox-Dollars.com
Market Profiles
MBS Internet.net
Market Factor.com
Market Profiles
Matrix Reward.com
Miller-Williams.com
Money-op.com
My Google Job.com
My Choice Rewards.com
N
National Opinion Panel.com
National Survey Guide.com
NetPollster
O
Opinion Paycheck.com
Online Insight
Online Proofreaders.com
Online Survey Cash.com
P
Paid2Survey
Paid For Free.com
Paid Marketing Panel.aavalue.com
Paid Surveys.com
Paid-Surveys-at-Home.com
Paid Surveys Etc.com
Paid Surveys Online.com
Paid Surveytopia
Pajama Cash.com
Panda research
Pinpoint research
Polls That Pay.com
Pop Culture Survey.com
Prize o Matic.com
Product Opinion Panel.com
Product Test Panel.com
Profit Survey.com
Q
QandCash.com
Question Market
R
Reliaclick.com
S
Secret Mystery Shopping.com
Secret Web Shopper.com.
Shadow Shopper.com
Shoppers Voice
Shopping Jobs Here.com
Silent Sales Machine.com
Site Review Authority.org
Sondages
STSRewards
Student-Surveys.org
Survey.net
SurveyAnnex.com
SurveyComplete.com
SurveyClub
SurveyExchange
SurveyExplosion
SurveyIncome System.com
SurveyLion.com
SurveyLot.com
SurveyMillions.com
SurveyMission
SurveyMonster.net
SurveyNew.com
SurveyNetworks.com
SurveyPass
SurveyPayday
SurveyPayoff.com
SurveyPeace.com
Survey-Platinum.com
SurveyPrincess
SurveyRewards.com
SurveyScout.com
SurveySponsors.com
SurveyStorage.com
SurveyStrategy
SurveysPaid.com
SurveySun.com
SurveyTeam
T
The Consumer Beat.com
The Global Survey Panel.com
The Paid Surveys.net
The Prize Panel.com
The Rich Jerk.com
The Survey Pro.com
The Ultimate Rewards.com
ThinkRewards.com
Tiktikcash
Top Dollar Surveys.com
Top Online Surveys.com
Top Site Ratings.com
Trialsize.com
Type-at-Home.com
Type International.com
U
Usa Brand Survey.com
Usefull Signups.com
V
Vindale research
Viva Research.com
W
Weekly Cash Income.com
Whats He Has To Say.com
Whats Your Opinion.net
X
Y
Your Opinion Pays.org
Z
Zoom Direct
DeadLock - Concept with beautiful example !!
Do you know the concept of 'Dead'lock in database ? or Operating System ? Did you understood that well ?If not See this picture... I'm sure It will be very clear..... you never forget this again.... njoy and share...
Your Manager - You - Your Team Leader *** A perfect image to describe ***
There are 2 people always next to you:
1 - The M (Manager), giving a pleasant smile every time he sees you.
2 - The TL (Team Leader), busy in scheduling work for you..... And busy in his world
And In between its YOU, who struggles with all the WORK...?!!
The perfect picture is given below...... {Team leader --- YOU --- Manager}
Which is the BEST - Infosys, Wipro or TCS?
One day, three consultants, one from Wipro, one from Infosys and one from TCS, went out for a walk.
"Why don't we prove who is the best among ourselves?"
Why not, said the other two.
The Infosian said "Let's have a test. Whoever makes this monkey laugh, works for the best firm".
Being a pure logical strategist, the person from TCS tried to make the monkey Laugh by telling jokes. The monkey stayed still. As a more practical consultant, the Wipro guy tried to make funny gestures... No good, the monkey stayed put. Now, comes the Infosian. Being the practical guy he was always trained to be, he whispered something into the monkey's ear, and it burst out laughing at him. The other two were astonished.
So the Wipro guy said "OK, let's take another test. Let's make this monkey cry!!"
So there they went again, applying the same methods as before. The TCS guy narrated sad stories, the Wipro guy made sad gestures, and they failed again.
Then, the Infosian again whispered something into the monkey's ear and oh! It started crying, patting the Infosian's shoulder! The other two just could not believe their eyes!
So the tcs guy said "OK, you've won twice. If you can win just this one, we will bow to you. Let's make this monkey run".
And he barked at the monkey and ordered him to run. Of course, it stayed where it was.. The Wipro guy, true to his type, pushed and prodded the monkey- still No go. So...here comes Infosian, again, and whispers into the monkey's ear. The Monkey just takes off! It runs and runs as fast as it can, as if it was scared to death! The other two surrendered.
They Said: "OK, we give up. You're the best among us, and you work for the Best firm of the three. But please, please tell us your secret," they begged him.
"Well", said the Infosian , "The first time I made it laugh, I told I work for Infosys . The next time, I told the monkey how much I get paid ...so it started crying. And then I told that I was here for recruitment !!!"
BMTC Bangalore Launched New Buses and New Website
Bangalore Metropolitan Transport Corporation(BMTC) serves the citizens of Bangalore with quality bus services.BMTC runs a fleet of Volvo buses for city transportation.There are also other services such as Big 10, Big C etc.You can check the information on bus routes , timings & bus passes in the bmtc website.
http://www.bmtcinfo.com/site/index.jsp
This is BMTC's new website with a new and simple look & lots of information.
1. Vajra: Hi-tech buses from Volvo running on routes serving the IT companies' locations and various residential routes as well.LED boards.
2.Vayu Vajra: Volvo buses to airport from various locations in Bangalore
3.Big 10: distinct green coloring with the Big10 logo.It connects 10 major roads in the city to the outer ring roads
4.Big Circle: Runs on the Outer Ring Road(ORR) of Bengaluru. Distinctly coloured with BigCircle written all over.
5. Blue buses: The new ordinary bus under the JN NURM scheme with low floors and LED boards.
6. Suvarna: Silver coloured with red lining. They have Re.1 higher for first 3 stages and then are on par with the ordinary. They carry LED boards.
7. Pushpak: Coffee coloured buses with fares similar to Suvarna.
8. Blue and White: the old ordinary buses with ordinary fares.
9. White and Blue: The Parisara vahini ordinary buses.
SOLID INTERVIEW - infosys friends - is this true ???
Interviewer: Tell me about yourself.
Candidate: I am Rameshwar Kulkarni. I did my Tele Communication engineering from BabanRao Dhole-Patil Institute of Technology.
Interviewer: BabanRao Dhole-Patil Institute of Technology? I had never heard of this college before!
Candidate: Great! Even I had not heard of it before getting an admission into it .. What happened is - due to cricket world cup I scored badly! In 12th.I was getting a aid seat in a good college.. But my father said (I prefer to call him 'baap') - "I can not invest so much of money".(The baap actually said - "I will never waste so much of money on you"). So I had to join this college. Frankly speaking this name - babanRao Dhole-Patil, can at the most be related to a Shetakari Mahavidyalaya.
Interviewer: ok, ok. It seems you have taken 6 years to complete your engineering.
Candidate: Actually I tried my best to finish it in 4 years. But you know, these cricket matches and football world cup, and tennis tournaments. It is difficult to concentrate. So I flunked in 2nd and 3rd year. So in all I took 4 + 2 = 7 years.
Interviewer: But 4+2 is 6.
Candidate: Oh, is it? You know I always had KT in maths. But I will try to keep this in mind. 4+2 is 6, good, thanks.. These cricket matches really affect exams a lot. I think they should ban it.
Interviewer: Good to know that you want cricket matches to be banned.
Candidate: No, no... I am talking about Exams!!
Interviewer: Ok, What is your biggest achievement in life?
Candidate: Obviously, completing my Engineering. My mom never thought I would complete it. In fact, when I flunked in 3rd year, she was looking for a job for me in BEST (Bus corporation in Maharashtra ) through some relative.
Interviewer: Do you have any plans of higher study?
Candidate: he he he.. Are you kidding? Completing 'lower' education itself was so much of pain!!
Interviewer: Let's talk about technical stuff. On which platforms have you worked?
Candidate: Well, I work at SEEPZ, so you can say Andheri is my current platform. Earlier I was at Vashi center. So Vashi was my platform then. As you can see I have experience of different platforms! (Vashi and Andheri are the places in Mumbai)
Interviewer: And which languages have you used?
Candidate: Marathi, Hindi, English. By the way, I can keep quiet in German, French, Russian and many other languages.
Interviewer: Why VC is better than VB?
Candidate: It is a common sense - C comes after B. So VC is a higher version than VB. I heard very soon they are coming up with a new language VD!
Interviewer: Do you know anything about Assembly Language?
Candidate: Well, I have not heard of it. But I guess, this is the language our ministers and MPs use in assembly.
Interviewer: What is your general project experience?
Candidate: My general experience about projects is - most of the times they are in pipeline!
Interviewer: Can you tell me about your current job?
Candidate: Sure, Currently I am working for Bata InfoTech ltd. Since joining BIL, I am on Bench. Before joining BIL, I used to think that Bench was another software like Windows.
Interviewer: Do you have any project management experience?
Candidate: No, but I guess it shouldn't be difficult. I know Word and Excel. I can talk a lot. I know how to dial for International phone call and use speaker facility. And very important - I know few words like-'Showstoppers ' , 'hotfixes', 'SEI-CMM','quality','versioncontrol','deadlines' , 'Customer Satisfaction' etc. Also I can blame others for my mistakes!
Interviewer: What are your expectations from our company?
Candidate: Not much.
1. I should at least get 40,000 in hand.
2. I would like to work on a live EJB project. But it should not have deadlines. I personally feel that pressure affects natural talent.
3. I believe in flexi-timings.
4. Dress code is against basic freedom, so I would like to wear t-shirt and jeans.
5. We must have sat-sun off. I will suggest Wednesday off also, so as to avoid breakdown due to overwork.
6. I would like to go abroad 3 times a year on short term preferably 1-2 months) assignments.. Personally I prefer US, Australia and Europe . But
considering the fact that there is Olympics coming up in China in the current year, I don't mind going there in that period. As you can see I am
modest and don't have many expectations. So can I assume my selection?
Interviewer: he he he ha ha ha. Thanks for your interest in our organization. In fact I was never entertained so much before. Welcome to
INFOSYS.
The fellow was appointed in a newly created section 'Stress Management' in the HRD of Infosys.
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