TEXT Slang for Baby Boomers

NSR = Need some roughage

T4W = Time for whiskey

TXT L8R = Can’t find reading glasses

WWIS = What was I saying?

IV-NV = My kid’s going to big-name college, neighbors jealous

JDTV? = Which channel has a Judi Dench movie tonight?

3dickPM = Read three detective novels this afternoon

M = Margaritaville

X2EZ = Crossword puzzle too easy

WILMA! = Lost my keys

WSWS = Wearing socks with sandals

RxV-->BW = Got Viagra prescription, just need Barry White cassettes

GOTMG = Going out to mulch garden

VROOM! = Got tires rotated

RB<DM = Russell Brand is no Dudley Moore

80/20 = Spouse doing more and more of the talking

NPR = Sleep aid; no prescription required

ARF :-) = Dogs don’t talk

]CVG[ = Stuck in Conversational Vise-Grip

DdoTH = Don’t do the Hustle, ever

VCR Rut = Watching “Caddyshack” tonight

M = Mojitoville

Ahhh = Memorable smoke smell wafting from my kids’ rooms

Brrr = Wearing socks to bed

TN2WMP = Trying not to wet my pants

PNP = Peeing in pants

[------] = Another funeral, can’t play poker/bridge/Scrabble